I don’t know what to feel about this book. Part of me hated it, so much. And the other part of me… unexpectedly loved it. Warning: This review is not really well thought out, because I’m a hot, hot mess after reading this book and I still am. Will ever be.
This is an intense book! Every uncomfortable and icky subjects were tackled here in Drowning Instinct. If you’re not comfortable with subjects like molestation, cutting, alcoholism, infidelity, lying, then stay the fuck away from this book. Because I’m warning you Drowning Instinct will give you a headache and heart wrenching story. Don’t tell me I didn’t warn you already.
I don’t want to tell this story and you know why? Because this is a fairy tale with teeth and claws.
Jenna is the main protagonist here, she’s a cutter and once been committed in a psych ward. She’s a one messed up girl and her family. Her mother is an alcoholic and possibly committing adultery and her father, like Jenna said, is a psycho (and not possibly), also committing adultery, always out and about screwing his nurses. And let’s meet the infamous teacher, Mr. Anderson, Jenna had an inappropriate and forbidden relationship with him! (Oh good lord) See what I’m talking about? The characters here in Drowning instinct are all fucked up! THEY ARE ALL FUCKED UP.
Drowning instinct is all told in Jenna’s pov. What really fascinating about this book was the way it was told. The beginning of the book was actually the last part and Jenna was just recalling her story into a police officer’s recorder. The thing about this is we don’t know if she’s reliable or not. Friendly reminder, she’s not very reliable and she’s the most unreliable character I’ve ever met.
Drowning Instinct made me feel a lot of emotions. There were times when I just wanted to fucking shake these characters up, because they are so.. bad and so human. There were times I just wanted Mr . Anderson and Jenna to be just happy, stay in their cabin and just have sex whatever they want. I know it’s forbidden, but you just can’t help but to root for these two characters. Mr. Anderson was also nice and so caring.
“Jenna, please. Please, look at me.”
I did – and that’s when I realized that eyes really are the window to the soul.
“Don’t go,” he whispered.
However, when the lies and deception started to unfold. I don’t know what to fucking believe anymore and I still don’t know what to believe.
If you’re looking for a happy ending with hearts and flowers. Well, Drowning Instinct is clearly not for you. This book will never give you answers instead it will give you more questions than ever and that questions will never be answered and it’s just up to you what do you want to believe. It’s up to you what do you want the story to turn out.
If you have read my review about How To Love. You know that I loved and hated it at the same time and it’s the same as Drowning Instinct. Even though I kept on saying that I hated the characters, who am I kidding? I loved them, I loved their flaws, their mistakes, and their lies.
I’m impressed, really impressed. Ilsa J. Bick, thank you for writing this book, for being brave, for creating these fucked up characters no one will think of loving.
It’s safe to say that I am emotionally wrecked because of this book and It’s been a long time since I wrote a long review. WOOOHOOO
If you want your heart to be ripped out in a million tiny pieces, If you want a story that is neither black nor white, well, this book is absolutely for you.
Any thoughts? Leave a comment! xo